One thing that breaks my heart is to think of all the children waiting for adoption. So many parents want to adopt newborns that the older children often end up waiting for something that will never happen for them. I can understand wanting to adopt a newborn, and everyone should be able to adopt the age they want, but there are many misconceptions about adopting a newborn verses an older child. If you think that you cannot bond with an older child, I am here to tell you from experience that this is simply not true.
Though my daughter was not one of the children waiting for adoption, there came a time when she had to come live with me. My brother’s wife died, and he was left to raise her on his own. He gave it his best try but he found that he could not do it. He asked my mom to take her, but because of her ill health, this did not last very long. She ended up in my care at age two. There are many children waiting for adoption that are that same age, and I can’t believe that others have not opened their hearts to them.
My little girl is loved more than I thought I could ever love another human being. The other children waiting for adoption deserve the same thing, and I hope with all of my heart that they get it. It doesn’t matter that she was not born to me, and it doesn’t matter that she was already two when she came into my home. The pain I have felt when separated from her, and the pure joy she has provided tells me that I love her as much as any mother loves a child, and that love is returned to me in spades. There are thousands of children waiting for adoption that have the same love to give if someone would just give them a chance.
If you want to adopt, but you are having trouble finding a newborn, you should consider looking into other children waiting for adoption. They may be older, but I assure you that the love will be the same. Yes, you will miss out on infanthood, but when it is all said and done, that will be a very minor issue. Some of the older children waiting for adoption run out of hope for a good life, and I cannot think of anything sadder. Think about opening your heart to an older child, and you may thank God each day that you did.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Adoption From China
My husband and I are best friends with a couple who has tried for years to conceive a child. They have exhausted most fertility methods that their insurance has allowed them. Finally, they were faced with the decision of trying some expensive methods that were not guaranteed, or of adopting. Over dinner one evening, they told us that they had been thinking about looking into adoption from China. My husband, having been adopted as a baby, told them that he thought that was a wonderful idea. I silently wondered to myself, why they couldn't adopt a child from our own country who needs a home, but expressed my delight for them. Over the next few months, they gathered lots of facts and information about how adoption from China works.
I decided to do some research on my own on adoption from China just to satisfy my own curiosity. I was actually quite fascinated to learn some facts that I would never have guessed. 95% of children that are adopted from China are females. That is because of their population control regulations. I think it is terribly sad that the government has chosen to regulate what the population can be, but I do not live in that country and will not get into that. So, almost anyone considering adoption from China will be guaranteed to be bringing home a little girl. I was surprised to learn that adoption from China averages $20,000 - $25,000. I wondered how the average family can afford those fees. Our friends said that they planned on taking out a home equity loan to be able to afford to move forward with adoption from China.
Both spouses who are looking into adoption from China must be at least 30 years old. That meant that our friends would have to wait one more year before starting the process, giving them time to get prepared and save some money as well. They also needed to get their passports and prepare to take a last minute trip once they were contacted that there was an available child for them. Adoption from China requires that at least one of the spouses travel to the country to bring their child home. I know that they both planned on being there to greet their new family member and perhaps enjoy their time overseas. Once they were both 30 years old, it would most likely be less than a year for them to be able to have a child. In America, that wait can be quite a bit longer.
After hearing their thoughts on adoption from China and doing some of my own research, I was excited for them. They knew that adoption from China was what they wanted to do. I had decided that I would be throwing them a huge shower when they brought home their new family member. They would definitely be deserving of it.
I decided to do some research on my own on adoption from China just to satisfy my own curiosity. I was actually quite fascinated to learn some facts that I would never have guessed. 95% of children that are adopted from China are females. That is because of their population control regulations. I think it is terribly sad that the government has chosen to regulate what the population can be, but I do not live in that country and will not get into that. So, almost anyone considering adoption from China will be guaranteed to be bringing home a little girl. I was surprised to learn that adoption from China averages $20,000 - $25,000. I wondered how the average family can afford those fees. Our friends said that they planned on taking out a home equity loan to be able to afford to move forward with adoption from China.
Both spouses who are looking into adoption from China must be at least 30 years old. That meant that our friends would have to wait one more year before starting the process, giving them time to get prepared and save some money as well. They also needed to get their passports and prepare to take a last minute trip once they were contacted that there was an available child for them. Adoption from China requires that at least one of the spouses travel to the country to bring their child home. I know that they both planned on being there to greet their new family member and perhaps enjoy their time overseas. Once they were both 30 years old, it would most likely be less than a year for them to be able to have a child. In America, that wait can be quite a bit longer.
After hearing their thoughts on adoption from China and doing some of my own research, I was excited for them. They knew that adoption from China was what they wanted to do. I had decided that I would be throwing them a huge shower when they brought home their new family member. They would definitely be deserving of it.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Parents Considering Adoption Overseas
When we first decided to adopt a child, we do not consider adoption overseas. Overseas adoption, we knew, was costly, time-consuming, and extremely frustrating. Adoption in Michigan was supposed to be easy in comparison. We have been living in the state for a long time, and we felt a certain connection to the place and its people. A Michigan adoption seemed to have a significance that adoption in Russia, for example, would not have.
Nonetheless, adoption Michigan proved to be much more difficult than we had thought. Apparently, all of the traditional depictions of orphans are inaccurate. Gone are the days when there were desperate orphans all over the country, waiting to be adopted. Most of the children – unless they are special needs adoption cases – are adopted at a very young age. If you want to find a baby to adopt, adoption overseas is definitely your best bet. In many countries, adoption is still frowned upon and there are many unwanted orphans. Adoption in China, for example, is one of the best ways for childless couples to get children of their own.
We settled on adoption overseas, but we were not happy about it. When you are considering overseas adoption, you had better have a lot of money to throw into the project. Adoption overseas can cost upwards of 7000 dollars, not including travel expenses. You may have to take several trips to the country of choice, interview with government bureaucrats, spent months going through the bureaucracy, and still not be able to adopt a child overseas. Adoption overseas is only for the dedicated few. If you do not have what it takes, you should not even try.
Nonetheless, our efforts at adoption oversees proved fruitful at last. It took us more than two years, but we were finally able to take home a beautiful, new born baby girl from China. She was unwanted in that country, where the government strictly regulates the number of children that each couple may have. This is why adoption overseas from China is so popular in this country. There are thousands and thousands of Chinese children born each year who are not wanted in their own country. We knew that our baby would not look anything like us when she grew up, but we did not care. We would love her and provide her with a home, and she would be our daughter.
Nonetheless, adoption Michigan proved to be much more difficult than we had thought. Apparently, all of the traditional depictions of orphans are inaccurate. Gone are the days when there were desperate orphans all over the country, waiting to be adopted. Most of the children – unless they are special needs adoption cases – are adopted at a very young age. If you want to find a baby to adopt, adoption overseas is definitely your best bet. In many countries, adoption is still frowned upon and there are many unwanted orphans. Adoption in China, for example, is one of the best ways for childless couples to get children of their own.
We settled on adoption overseas, but we were not happy about it. When you are considering overseas adoption, you had better have a lot of money to throw into the project. Adoption overseas can cost upwards of 7000 dollars, not including travel expenses. You may have to take several trips to the country of choice, interview with government bureaucrats, spent months going through the bureaucracy, and still not be able to adopt a child overseas. Adoption overseas is only for the dedicated few. If you do not have what it takes, you should not even try.
Nonetheless, our efforts at adoption oversees proved fruitful at last. It took us more than two years, but we were finally able to take home a beautiful, new born baby girl from China. She was unwanted in that country, where the government strictly regulates the number of children that each couple may have. This is why adoption overseas from China is so popular in this country. There are thousands and thousands of Chinese children born each year who are not wanted in their own country. We knew that our baby would not look anything like us when she grew up, but we did not care. We would love her and provide her with a home, and she would be our daughter.
Family And Friends Make Adoption Announcements
I recently decided to adopt a child. I never had thought about it, but adopting a child involves a lot of difficult negotiating, especially in the first year. Don't get me wrong, we clicked very quickly. The problem was, I couldn't figure out exactly how to introduce him to the family. I have a large extended family, including many friends who are not technically related to me. They were all happy to hear that I had decided to adopt a child, and I wanted to have a party to welcome him into the family. Nonetheless, I couldn't decide on the issue of adoption announcements.
You see, adoption birth announcements can be pretty tricky. On the one hand, you do not want the baby boy announcements to make the child stand out. You want him to feel relaxed and comfortable in the family. Adoption announcements would be bad enough for a newborn child, but my child was already three years old! Although he would probably forget his early life, nonetheless I did not want to traumatize him with the party.
I could not figure out whether or not to send out adoption announcements. If you have worked with children, you might think that it would be an easy decision to make. A social worker friend of mine said that it was clearly a situation where I should let the event pass without celebration. She said adoption announcements can make them feel like they are outcasts or freaks.
Instead, she suggested having a few intimate friends over at a time and gradually introducing him to everyone. The problem was that I knew if I didn't send out adoption announcements, I was probably bound to offend someone. My family is very big on formality, and the adoption announcements were almost a given to them. They figured that if anyone was joining the family, whether they were adopted, newborn, or someone's fiancé, they should be brought around to meet everyone.
Finally, I decided not to get adoption announcements. Instead, I waited until his first birthday. Although a few people were miffed at the absence of an adoption announcements party, the vast majority of my relatives understood. You have to be very careful with an adopted child's feelings. Children in general can be delicate, but adopted children are especially prone to be so. Adopting a child, after all, is not like adopting a pet. You can not just show him around and expect him to love everyone and everyone to love him. It takes a lighter touch, and a longer period of time than that.
You see, adoption birth announcements can be pretty tricky. On the one hand, you do not want the baby boy announcements to make the child stand out. You want him to feel relaxed and comfortable in the family. Adoption announcements would be bad enough for a newborn child, but my child was already three years old! Although he would probably forget his early life, nonetheless I did not want to traumatize him with the party.
I could not figure out whether or not to send out adoption announcements. If you have worked with children, you might think that it would be an easy decision to make. A social worker friend of mine said that it was clearly a situation where I should let the event pass without celebration. She said adoption announcements can make them feel like they are outcasts or freaks.
Instead, she suggested having a few intimate friends over at a time and gradually introducing him to everyone. The problem was that I knew if I didn't send out adoption announcements, I was probably bound to offend someone. My family is very big on formality, and the adoption announcements were almost a given to them. They figured that if anyone was joining the family, whether they were adopted, newborn, or someone's fiancé, they should be brought around to meet everyone.
Finally, I decided not to get adoption announcements. Instead, I waited until his first birthday. Although a few people were miffed at the absence of an adoption announcements party, the vast majority of my relatives understood. You have to be very careful with an adopted child's feelings. Children in general can be delicate, but adopted children are especially prone to be so. Adopting a child, after all, is not like adopting a pet. You can not just show him around and expect him to love everyone and everyone to love him. It takes a lighter touch, and a longer period of time than that.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Overseas Consultation And Adoption Plans
When we first decided to adopt a child, we do not consider adoption overseas. Overseas adoption, we knew, was costly, time-consuming, and extremely frustrating. Adoption in Michigan was supposed to be easy in comparison. We have been living in the state for a long time, and we felt a certain connection to the place and its people. A Michigan adoption seemed to have a significance that adoption in Russia, for example, would not have.
Nonetheless, adoption Michigan proved to be much more difficult than we had thought. Apparently, all of the traditional depictions of orphans are inaccurate. Gone are the days when there were desperate orphans all over the country, waiting to be adopted. Most of the children – unless they are special needs adoption cases – are adopted at a very young age. If you want to find a baby to adopt, adoption overseas is definitely your best bet. In many countries, adoption is still frowned upon and there are many unwanted orphans. Adoption in China, for example, is one of the best ways for childless couples to get children of their own.
We settled on adoption overseas, but we were not happy about it. When you are considering overseas adoption, you had better have a lot of money to throw into the project. Adoption overseas can cost upwards of 7000 dollars, not including travel expenses. You may have to take several trips to the country of choice, interview with government bureaucrats, spent months going through the bureaucracy, and still not be able to adopt a child overseas. Adoption overseas is only for the dedicated few. If you do not have what it takes, you should not even try.
Nonetheless, our efforts at adoption oversees proved fruitful at last. It took us more than two years, but we were finally able to take home a beautiful, new born baby girl from China. She was unwanted in that country, where the government strictly regulates the number of children that each couple may have. This is why adoption overseas from China is so popular in this country. There are thousands and thousands of Chinese children born each year who are not wanted in their own country. We knew that our baby would not look anything like us when she grew up, but we did not care. We would love her and provide her with a home, and she would be our daughter.
Nonetheless, adoption Michigan proved to be much more difficult than we had thought. Apparently, all of the traditional depictions of orphans are inaccurate. Gone are the days when there were desperate orphans all over the country, waiting to be adopted. Most of the children – unless they are special needs adoption cases – are adopted at a very young age. If you want to find a baby to adopt, adoption overseas is definitely your best bet. In many countries, adoption is still frowned upon and there are many unwanted orphans. Adoption in China, for example, is one of the best ways for childless couples to get children of their own.
We settled on adoption overseas, but we were not happy about it. When you are considering overseas adoption, you had better have a lot of money to throw into the project. Adoption overseas can cost upwards of 7000 dollars, not including travel expenses. You may have to take several trips to the country of choice, interview with government bureaucrats, spent months going through the bureaucracy, and still not be able to adopt a child overseas. Adoption overseas is only for the dedicated few. If you do not have what it takes, you should not even try.
Nonetheless, our efforts at adoption oversees proved fruitful at last. It took us more than two years, but we were finally able to take home a beautiful, new born baby girl from China. She was unwanted in that country, where the government strictly regulates the number of children that each couple may have. This is why adoption overseas from China is so popular in this country. There are thousands and thousands of Chinese children born each year who are not wanted in their own country. We knew that our baby would not look anything like us when she grew up, but we did not care. We would love her and provide her with a home, and she would be our daughter.
Adoption Announcements For New Born Children
I recently decided to adopt a child. I never had thought about it, but adopting a child involves a lot of difficult negotiating, especially in the first year. Don't get me wrong, we clicked very quickly. The problem was, I couldn't figure out exactly how to introduce him to the family. I have a large extended family, including many friends who are not technically related to me. They were all happy to hear that I had decided to adopt a child, and I wanted to have a party to welcome him into the family. Nonetheless, I couldn't decide on the issue of adoption announcements.
You see, adoption birth announcements can be pretty tricky. On the one hand, you do not want the baby boy announcements to make the child stand out. You want him to feel relaxed and comfortable in the family. Adoption announcements would be bad enough for a newborn child, but my child was already three years old! Although he would probably forget his early life, nonetheless I did not want to traumatize him with the party.
I could not figure out whether or not to send out adoption announcements. If you have worked with children, you might think that it would be an easy decision to make. A social worker friend of mine said that it was clearly a situation where I should let the event pass without celebration. She said adoption announcements can make them feel like they are outcasts or freaks.
Instead, she suggested having a few intimate friends over at a time and gradually introducing him to everyone. The problem was that I knew if I didn't send out adoption announcements, I was probably bound to offend someone. My family is very big on formality, and the adoption announcements were almost a given to them. They figured that if anyone was joining the family, whether they were adopted, newborn, or someone's fiancé, they should be brought around to meet everyone.
Finally, I decided not to get adoption announcements. Instead, I waited until his first birthday. Although a few people were miffed at the absence of an adoption announcements party, the vast majority of my relatives understood. You have to be very careful with an adopted child's feelings. Children in general can be delicate, but adopted children are especially prone to be so. Adopting a child, after all, is not like adopting a pet. You can not just show him around and expect him to love everyone and everyone to love him. It takes a lighter touch, and a longer period of time than that.
You see, adoption birth announcements can be pretty tricky. On the one hand, you do not want the baby boy announcements to make the child stand out. You want him to feel relaxed and comfortable in the family. Adoption announcements would be bad enough for a newborn child, but my child was already three years old! Although he would probably forget his early life, nonetheless I did not want to traumatize him with the party.
I could not figure out whether or not to send out adoption announcements. If you have worked with children, you might think that it would be an easy decision to make. A social worker friend of mine said that it was clearly a situation where I should let the event pass without celebration. She said adoption announcements can make them feel like they are outcasts or freaks.
Instead, she suggested having a few intimate friends over at a time and gradually introducing him to everyone. The problem was that I knew if I didn't send out adoption announcements, I was probably bound to offend someone. My family is very big on formality, and the adoption announcements were almost a given to them. They figured that if anyone was joining the family, whether they were adopted, newborn, or someone's fiancé, they should be brought around to meet everyone.
Finally, I decided not to get adoption announcements. Instead, I waited until his first birthday. Although a few people were miffed at the absence of an adoption announcements party, the vast majority of my relatives understood. You have to be very careful with an adopted child's feelings. Children in general can be delicate, but adopted children are especially prone to be so. Adopting a child, after all, is not like adopting a pet. You can not just show him around and expect him to love everyone and everyone to love him. It takes a lighter touch, and a longer period of time than that.
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